I would like to explain myself for the gongs that have been clanging loudly when I walk by. Have you heard the chains breaking? You’ve probably witnessed the dancing, and I’m sorry if you’ve heard the singing. Do you feel it? Neither do I, because the weight, oh that heavy burdensome weight is gone. What a sight to see; transformation, resurrection, satisfaction, redemption, but most of all, freedom.

I’d like to take you on a journey of redemptive freedom.

I found myself in the midst of the ball and chains. As I tugged and struggled to get away I found myself caged in to my mistakes. I was told I had freedom, so why didn’t I feel free? I was in the midst of the enraging tornado sucking the life out of me. I forgot who I was. I did not know what I represented, all I knew was my name. What was a name if it had no meaning? What was life if there was no purpose? Could purpose be rediscovered in the midst of failure? Time, the unbearable wait of time, was the only determining factor. I was alone. My only company was my chain, her name was Control. I wasn’t ready to cut the unbearable pain that she caused, because it was the only thing keeping me breathing. I felt pain, so I knew the feeling meant I was still alive.

“For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons and daughters, by whom we cry, ‘Abba, Father!’ Romans 8:15

I am a daughter. A daughter of THE King. This idea was thought of by God, made possible through Jesus, and made personal through the spirit. He has given me freedom through his blood, so why did I feel so entangled? When I believed in Jesus as my Lord and Savior through faith I gained adoption of God. Yet, I couldn’t let go of my chains.

“And he said to all, ‘If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.” Luke 9:23

Did this mean my chains too? Did this mean I had to let go of control? I couldn’t let go of what how I viewed myself. I couldn’t let go of my pride. I couldn’t let go of my fears. I couldn’t let go of control. I needed to rule my life, because I didn’t trust that God had the best for me.

I continued to live in this battle unwilling to fight. I hid in the corner petrified to face my enemy who convinced me he was stronger. I was running back to God trying to reattach the chains he told me had broken. It was comfortable. I knew what to expect from my chains. I found myself at the bottom of the ocean with a ball and chain on my foot and the only way to not drown was to let go.

“The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want.” Psalm 23:1

He is right in calling me his and claiming ownership, as he is our maker, but I didn’t believe he is the Good Shepherd. Oh, but he is! The good shepherd lays down his life for his sheep. He constantly protects, and intercedes on our behalf. He gives us all we need in this moment. I cannot handle the entirety of the goodness of God, it would overwhelm me. It is delivered at the perfect time. When we compare Satan’s shepherding skills to the Lord’s we see polar opposites. Satan is always taking his eyes off his sheep, and letting them overindulge. It is the master of people’s lives who make the difference in their destiny.

I was like a sheep who was bought by a shepherd. I was given a beautiful pasture to roam in, I was provided for, taken care of, I had all that I needed inside the fence of my owner. I looked over to the neighbor’s pasture, there was brown grass, the sheep were dirty, and were always getting sick. Yet, somehow I convinced myself it seemed more fun. The sheep didn’t have rules, they could eat all they wanted, they could do whatever they wanted. I always tried to get over to the neighbor’s land, but my shepherd came for me every single time.

“For freedom Christ has set you free; stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery.” Galatians 5:1

I was always running away from freedom, because I didn’t trust in goodness of God. It’s been at the cross waiting for me to embrace it, to walk in it. Praise Jesus in his relentless pursuit for all of me! Praise Jesus that he wages war against my flesh to win my heart! Thank you, Jesus for giving your very life for me, and telling me I was worth it all. Our God is unrelenting in love.

So, my friends, I live, I dance, I sing, I rejoice in this freedom! How can you not be free in this powerful love? Oh, do not let Satan steal that joy, and persuade you into darkness. God is worth all our trust, desires, wants, fears, and dreams. Let go! Let go of it all. Ultimately, we are not in control, and we never will be, it’s like chasing the wind. Scary, I know… but how much better it is to give control to God, who withholds no good thing from his children. Arriving at this place, I was able to BREATHE. I was embraced by my King’s arms. I was satisfied. I am filled with joy. I am redeemed.

It is not a process and it’s not a step by step program, (that’s your control issue talking of how to fix it) it is nothing you can do, except humbly bow before our God and say, “I surrender.”

“Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold the new has come.” 2 Corinthians 5:17

“He must increase, but I must decrease.” John 3:30