I am in a season of waiting. A season of hoping. I wait by my phone constantly, refresh my email at least once an hour, distractedly pay attention to the life I am in because my mind is elsewhere.
Waiting and Hoping
As a soon-to-be parent, I am always trying to view things from how God views them as our Heavenly Father. Recently he’s given me such a picture of what it looks like to wait with anticipation in prayer and how to endure the in between.
When we think back on our lives, hasn’t most of it been a season of waiting? Waiting for something better to come along. Waiting to get into college. Waiting for our future spouse to come into our life. Waiting on having children. Waiting for the next job. Waiting for our children to have children. Waiting to retire. Waiting to die. It feels like we are always waiting but, what if God had something in store as we wait?
What if we stopped viewing our lives as set in a “pause” mode amidst the waiting but instead, we saw it as a season of learning, growing, and anticipation of what is to come. I know for me, whenever I feel like I am in the “pause” of my life, I tend to think of it as a break from being the person I am called to be. For example, I’m not a mother yet and I’ve been a wife for a little bit now so I’m kind of in between two phases of life so… once I become a mom then I’ll be healthier, more patient, more loving, kind-hearted. Now I know some of you seasoned mothers out there are laughing at me right now like, “yeah right, Kali… children will actually bring fatter, impatient, less loving, and very unkind version of yourself to life.” Stick with me…the point I am trying to make is: we often wait to be the person we are called to be because we don’t think we’ve “arrived” yet and once we get to a certain point, status, time frame in our lives then we will become the good Christian we’ve always promised ourselves we’d be.
Ask God, “what can I learn in this season of waiting and how can I grow to be the best fit for your kingdom and all you want to use me for?”
I am in the middle of waiting for a call, an email, a text to tell Austin and me there is a child coming to our home. In fact, as I write this post I think I’ve looked at my phone at least 15 times.
As I was making the bed earlier today, I was thinking about all the activities I can’t wait to do with my child, all of the love and laughter, tears, and the life we will do together. My excitement quickly turned from excitement to restlessness as I wondered, “when will we get the call, what will he/she look like, what will he or she’s interests be, what will their fears be?” As my mind began spiraling out of control, I heard the whisper that reminded me to stop and be still and lay my burdens and worries at the feet of Jesus. As I did, I was reminded of how our Heavenly Father feels as He waits for us. From the moment we take our first breath, He is waiting. He’s waiting for our hearts to come home and turn to Him: our Savior, our King. God so desperately wants us to come home.
Now, obviously, God is all-knowing and knows the very moment if/when we are going to accept Jesus Christ as our Savior and Lord and come home but still, he waits, patiently, wooing us and interceding for us. I cannot imagine the joy our Father in Heaven feels when a lost son or daughter comes home.
I think about the excitement and the joy there will be once we get that call saying, “Austin and Kali, there’s a child coming home to you today.” I can’t even write that without taking a break to run around the house like a crazy woman filled with jubilation. WE GET TO BE PARENTS!! WHAT!! I’m teary, excited, and anxious all at the same time and IT HASN’T EVEN HAPPENED YET! The news that our child is coming home is the greatest news we’ve ever received. He/she is coming home.
I cannot wait for the day I get to tell them, “oh, my sweet sweet child. We have been waiting for you. We have pursued you for months. We have waited just for you to be apart of this family. We have prayed for you. We’ve longed for you. We are overjoyed you are finally home.”
In the same way, if you have trusted your faith in Christ to be your Lord and Savior, He says those words to you, “oh, my sweet sweet child. I have been waiting for you. I have pursued you for years. I sent my son to die on the cross for you. I have waited just for you to belong to me. I have longed for you for so long,” and once we see Him face to face as we transition from this life to the next we will hear, “I am overjoyed you are finally home. Well done my good and faithful servant.” He is in the waiting, in the stillness, in the moments we are unsure, conflicted, restless, He is there and He can’t wait for you to come home.
Kali Dunson